« The Old Angle | Main | Sulfur? »
Cancer
By matt | August 7, 2008
If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. Thanks for visiting!
I don’t have cancer. A friend has cancer. I learned this on Friday. These are random thoughts.
Cancer is not like other diseases
If I get heart disease, it will probably be because I had too many beers or ate more hamburgers than was good for me. I’ll know why I got heart disease. Because I made a choice to eat and drink.
But unless you are Marie Curie and spent years playing with radioactive substances, there usually isn’t that direct link between cause and effect. In the case of my friend, doctors have no idea what causes the kind of cancer he has contracted. It just happens. They have treatments, but they can’t say why he got the cancer.
Things change fast
In June, my friend did not have cancer. On some day in July, one of the cells of his body changed. He had cancer. In August, he is in the hospital and is expected to be there for weeks.
There was literally no warning or run-up to this where anybody could have said “if only we paid more attention”. He and his wife paid attention. He went to the doctor when he started feeling sick. The doctors did their tests. There wasn’t any way to detect this sooner.
Now their lives are fundamentally different and that fundamental change happened in two weeks. They went from a routine life that involved work and grocery shopping to one that involves cancer centers, teams of doctors, insurance policies and more.
I don’t have cancer
I don’t have cancer. I keep telling myself this. I’m not him, but he is about my age, lives about the same way I do…he and I are in the same demographic segment across many dimensions.
I don’t think this means I will get cancer.
But suddenly, mortality is close. Life seems more important than it did two weeks ago.
Sutra
This is a sutra that I have hanging in my house. Over time, it slowly fades into the background. Then, something happens and it springs into focus again. It reads:
Let me respectfully remind you,
Life and Death are of supreme importance.
Time passes swiftly and opportunity is lost.
Take heed, do not squander your life.
Music
I am listening to the Orchestra’s recording of Carmina Burana. Dramatic and somber and a touch cliche, I suppose…but appropriate for my mood, so no apologies.
Topics: none of the above |